Monday 10 November 2008

A tad behind on my reading...

So, after buying another pile of books, I thought I'd put together all the books I have that I've yet had time to read or have yet to finish. This is the result:

  1. The Prayer of Jabez, Bruce Wilkinson
  2. Great Expectations, Charles Dickens (reading)
  3. Wild at Heart, John Eldridge
  4. Captivating, John and Stacy Eldridge (It came WITH Wild at Heart, okay??)
  5. Yours, Jack, CS Lewis
  6. The Similrillion, JRR Tolkien
  7. Misquoting Truth, Timothy Paul Jones
  8. Life Changes (Romans)
  9. Announcing the Kingdom, Arthur F Glassen
  10. Wuthering Hights, Emily Bronte
  11. The Bourne Supremacy, Robert Ludlum
  12. A Tale of Two Cities, Charles Dickens
  13. The Digital Photography Manual
  14. The Divine Conspiracy, Dallas Willard
  15. U2 by U2
  16. The Sacred Echo, Margaret Feinberg
  17. The Pelican Brief, John Grisham
  18. A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23, W Phillip Keller (reading)
  19. The Vampire Lestat, Anne Rice
  20. Long Walk to Freedom, Nelson Mandela (reading)
  21. How to get ready for short-term missions, Anne-Geri Fann
  22. Through Painted Deserts, Donald Miller
  23. Trek!, Claes Grundsten
  24. One, Vaden Earl
  25. Dune, Frank Herbert
  26. The Betrayal of Africa, Gerald Caplan
  27. The Pillars of the Earth, Ken Follet
  28. Operation World
  29. The Three Musketeers, Alexandre Dumas
  30. Harpercollins Bible Commentary
  31. The Shack, William P Young (reading)
  32. A Long Way Gone, Ishmael Beah
  33. In Quest of Jesus, W Barnes Tatum
  34. God in the Alley, Greg Paul
  35. Bono, Michka Assayas
  36. The Reentry Team, Neal Pirolo
  37. Stuff White People Like, Christian Lander
  38. The Messenger, the Message, the Community, Roland Muller
  39. The Kingdom of God in the Teaching of Jesus, Mark Saucy
  40. The Heavenly Man, Brother Yun
  41. Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, Robert M Pirsig (not in the picture and I've technically read it before)

That's a total of 41 books, 4 that I'm reading now, the rest... hopefully sometime.

yikes...

Wednesday 29 October 2008

My place in this world - Michael W. Smith

The wind is moving
But I am standing still
A life of pages
Waiting to be filled

A heart that's hopeful
A head that's full of dreams
But this becoming
Is harder than it seems

Feels like I'm
Looking for a reason
Roamin' through the night to find
My place in this world
My place in this world
Not a lot to lean on
I need your light to help me find
My place in this world
My place in this world

If there are millions
Down on their knees
Among the many
Can you still hear me

Hear me asking
Where do I belong?
Is there a vision
That I can call my own?

Show me, I'm
Looking for a reason
Roamin' through the night to find
My place in this world
My place in this world
Not a lot to lean on
I need your light to help me find
My place in this world
My place in this world

Lookin' for a reason
Roamin' through the night to find
My place in this world
My place in this world
Not a lot to lean on
I need your light to help me find
My place in this world
My place in this world

Lookin' for a reason
Roamin' through the night to find
My place in this world
My place in this world

Tuesday 21 October 2008

I'm pretty sure this is irony...

My Grandpa can't find his GPS.

Irony, yes?

Wednesday 8 October 2008

more than touché

Saw a comic strip with this as the dialogue at the CRWRF delegates meeting on Saturday:

"Sometimes I'd like to ask God why He allows poverty, famine, and injustice in the world when He could do something about it."

"Why don't you?"

"I'm afraid He might ask me the same thing."

Thursday 25 September 2008

You! Jonah!

By Thomas Carlisle

And Jonah stalked
to his shaded seat
and waited for God
to come around
to his way of thinking.
And God is still waiting for a host of Jonahs
in their comfortable houses
to come around
to His way of loving.


I keep a bit of a journal beside me when I read so I can jot down my thoughts and some quotes from whatever it is I happen to be reading. I usually also write down the author, book and page number when I do.

But sometimes I forget.

The above poem, I believe, was a quote from a quote. I think John Piper quoted it in his book Let the Nations be Glad from Thomas Carlile's book You! Jonah!

Every once and a while I like to go through my notebook and read through my notes. I find it interesting to see what it is I was learning at that point, what really struck a cord in me at that time, and how much it strikes me now. I also like to read them because I not only forget to write down where I got the quote, I tend to completely forget the quote. Like this one!

I like this poem a lot. I think it describes us as a society and a church quite accurately. But there's a bit of irony in all of it. We might read this poem and agree; we need to love as God loves us! We need to get out there and be love!

But then we don't.

We feel we've changed by reading this poem. We think we're different.

But we're not.
We're still sitting in our comfortable houses.
Like right now. I can't speak for you, but I'm sitting in my house and I'm quite comfortable.

The same goes for movies. We watch a movie like Shindler's List, Water, Bowling for Columbine, Hotel Rwanda, Life is Beautiful or even Crash and we feel changed. We feel like we've made a difference in the world just by watching this movie.

And the same also goes for our reading of the Bible. How often do we read over the end of Matthew 25, agree that Jesus is saying something important, but then don't actually change anything in our lives. We may feel different because we learned something, but we don't act any different. And if you're not acting any different,
did you really learn anything??

Jesus tells us that when the Son of Man comes, He will separate us into groups.

Group Sheep will be those who fed the hungry, who gave the thirsty something to drink, invited strangers into their homes, gave clothes to those who needed them, took after the sick and visited inmates.

I think the other group (Group Goat) will be full of people who just watched movies, read books and this passage - but stayed in their comfortable houses.

Group Sheep showed love.
Group Goat just watched movies about love.

I'm not dissing movies, especially not these ones. These movies are awesome.

But the next time something really strikes you as true and Biblically sound, don't hold yourself back! Don't contain it! Jesus tells us that HE is the one we are helping when we show love to those who don't normally receive it.


Jesus is hungry.
Go feed Him!

Jesus is thirsty.
Go give him a drink!

Jesus is homeless.
Go give Him a room!

Jesus is shivering.
Go give Him clothes!

Jesus is sick.
Go look after Him!

Jesus is in jail.
Go visit Him!


PS, I've realized my blog is a bit on the dull side visually, so I'm hoping to remember to upload a photo or two from now on with each post. But I'll probably forget...

This is the sun through the trees at the ROOTS day. Was pretty awesome.

Other picture is a baseball at my church picnic. Also fun!














Wednesday 3 September 2008

hmm

I went to a mission conference in Ancaster tonight. I plan on going all day Wednesday and Thursday as well. Should be pretty sweet. Tonight, the speaker (Rev. Victor Atalla) mentioned something that I thought was neat. Something that Donald Miller kinda refers to in Blue Like Jazz and I think I've kinda mentioned in a blog or two.

He was speaking about bringing Christ to Muslims, and he specified, not to bring someone to Christianity, but to bring them to Christ. I think that's such a good way to look at it. If you're trying to bring someone to Christianity, you're trying to bring them to YOUR definition of Christianity. And the chances are pretty good that they don't share the same definition. They may have been hurt by Christians or not view them very well, so why would they WANT to become one? Even still, your Christianity may not 'work' for them. Even MORE still, Christians have messed up a lot in the past. We don't have a good reputation to everyone. Christ, however, is perfect. That's who WE should try to be like and who we should show/tell others how to be like.

Instead of bringing them to become a Christian, bring them to Christ.

Don't try to get people to be like you, get them to try be like Christ.

It's who you're trying to be like anyway. Skip the middleman!


PS, if you want to read a really good book about how Christians are seen to the average Joe, read the book unChristian. It's pretty interesting. The title refers to how we call ourselves Christians, yet often act unChristian, and how the world notices our unChristian behaviour.


Anywho, I posted some pictures of Irish-land. Stopped off there on my way home from Nigeria. Find them here, here, here and here!

Thursday 28 August 2008

No promises

but I promise to keep this blog updated.

First off, some pictures of when I stopped off in England on my way home. (Ireland, Holland, Ottawa, Montreal, Radiohead concert and two weeks of Campfire are still to come...)

I will post any updates of me going back to Nigeria. Nothing to post about that yet. Don't know a whole lot about it, just that it probably wouldn't be until January.

I'm kinda torn on it, really. Before I went to Nigeria I had the mind-set that someone who did "God's work" was a theologian or a minister or a missionary or something really along those lines. Now, coming back, I've kinda been humbled into the realization that in working a regular job, I could be doing EXACTLY what it is God has planned for me. Which is tough.


Trying to figure out what God wants me to do,

and what I THINK God wants me to do...

is really, really hard.

Saturday 9 August 2008

One of the cool things about concerts

is that no matter how loud you are,
no one can hear you messing up the words.

Ps, Radiohead in Montréal rockéd.

Saturday 26 July 2008

Surprise!

I'm home!

I landed at 4pm on Wednesday (23rd). I spent the next couple days freaking out my friends and family who weren't expecting me until the 28th.

It was fun.

My Aunt Marg and Uncle Steve picked me up at the airport and drove me home. I walked up to the house and my parents were outside. Then they called up some of my family and invited them over and I surprised them too.

I had my friend Brandon waiting at the train station by my house to pick up a friend of mine (who doesn't actually exist) and I snuck up on him too. The next day I showed up at Dave's house and surprised him and his family. Then to Campden to surprise Jon and Stef. Stef freaked out.

Like I said, it was fun.

I still haven't heard any thing about the job in Nigeria. Until then I'll be working on trying to fix all the things my family broke of mine while I was gone. Such as my virus filled computer, over-frozen fridge, cracked cell phone screen (beyond repair)...

Saturday 19 July 2008

Here, there and everywhere!

Hey folks.


I've been a lousy blogger updater as of late. Sorry to all my fans. Don't know how the two of you have been coping...


Soooo.... you may know, but I'm no longer IN Nigeria. I left on Monday. Here's a bit of how things have been going and will be going from here, starting with last Sunday:


Sunday: travelled from Jos to Abuja, hung out with Corinne and Rene in Abuja.
Monday: Flew from Abuja to London, trained to Exeter
Tuesday: Hung out with Chris in Exeter.
Wednesday: Trained back to London, saw Les Miserables in the West End with Debbie.
Thursday: Flew to Belfast, hung out with Kathryn and Esther.
Friday: Toured Belfast, drove farther North. Saw some sights later in the day.
Now, this is all future plans:
Saturday: See Giant's Causway and the rope bridge. Also a whiskey brewery and some other Irish stuff.
Sunday: Meet up with Jayne, see more Irish stuff, fly to Amsterdam.
Monday: Dutch stuff
Tuesday: Dutch stuff
Wednesday: Fly to Roma!
Thursday-Sunday: Italy!! (I don't really have this all planned out yet. But I haven't actually planned out ANYTHING and it's all worked out REALLY well, so I think I'm just going to keep going like this for a while until it stops working)
Monday: Fly back to London, fly home!!
So, yeah. I've been having a blast. Enjoy this picture, taken in Belfast, Ireland. I swear it. No photoshopping was done.

Tuesday 1 July 2008

Looking back on the path God has taken me.

I can't stop smiling right now. Read on and you'll find out why.

Let go and let God.

I like that saying. I think it kinda reflects how I've been dealing with what has been happening in my life. I think I've come to terms the fact that God actually is the one running things and that, try as I might, I can't do a thing to stop what He's set in motion. I love looking back on the path I've taken in the past few years. How what seemed like such small details at the time, has ballooned out into these vital assets. After High School, I needed to go to college. Because that's what people my age were supposed to do.

There was nothing I felt passionately about enough to go into debt over, so I applied to the closest schools for various different things. Sheridan, Mohawk... and another one I can't remember. I wasn't one of those High School kids who knew exactly what he wanted to do with the rest of his life (was anyone??). I didn't even apply for the same thing twice at the different colleges. Sheridan for Art Fundamentals, Mohawk for Advertising and Graphic Design, plus I applied for Journalism (can't remember where) and something else somewhere else. I was just putting it all out there and seeing what happened. I figured I'd wait and see what I got accepted into and THEN make my decision on what I wanted to spend the rest of my life doing. Unfortunately(?), I got accepted into everything I applied for. Which meant I had to make a decision. I had to pick one of these 5 courses and spend the next 3 or more years pursuing it. That's a tough decision. So I made it easier. I picked the closest school.

Mohawk. Barely a 20 minute drive, 30-50 minutes by buses.
Advertising. I like commercials and I like to pretend I'm creative.

So that's what I did.

I took Advertising for 3 years. I made a lot of good friends. I had a lot of fun. I learned a ton. I learned a lot of computer stuff, learned how to write better, learned how to interact with people who AREN'T Dutch, had friends who weren't Canadian Reformed, and some (gasp!) weren't even Christians. I learned how to reflect Christ to others around me. I learned how to talk to people about Jesus. I learned that some people truly are curious about Christianity and want to know about it. But won't learn unless you reflect Jesus because if you don't, they may never know you call him your Saviour.

I see so much of what I learned coming back to help me now. Pretty much everything. If I hadn't taken Advertising, I wouldn't know PhotoShop, InDesign or Illustrator (computer programs), how to use a Mac (type of computer), or how to design and write something appealing to a wide audience. All of these skills I've put into practice here. And in using them here, even MORE doors have opened for me.

Because I just let things fall where they lay, I went to Mohawk.
Because I went to Mohawk, I learned Advertising.
Because I learned Advertising, I learned even more.
Because of all I learned, I was able be an intern at Rurcon.
Because I was able to be an intern at Rurcon, I was able to be an intern at Beacon of Hope.
Because I was an intern at Beacon of Hope, I've been offered a position at Beacon of Hope.

But that's not it, God's path for me hasn't been that straightforward. So much led to so much more. Had I not gone to Romania, I wouldn't have heard about Nigeria. If I didn't learn to drive a standard transmission back home, I wouldn't be able to drive around here, and would've had much more doors closed. If I didn't buy Rachel's laptop at the last minute, I wouldn't have been able to do... pretty much any of the work that I've been able to.

It's quite the path.
And I thank God for every step.
Especially the hard ones.
Those were the ones I learned the most.
I've learned to depend on God for so much more.
I've learned to let go
and let God.

Back to my ever-present grin.

Maybe you caught it, maybe you didn't. The clue was in the last bit of my path, where I wrote:

"I've been offered a position at Beacon of Hope"

This happened last Tuesday. And I haven't stopped smiling since. It's an opportunity that has come up that would start in October and go for a little under 2 years.
I don't know if I'll take the position. I'm not even sure what all the details are yet. (I still haven't seen a job description). What I do know is that this is another part on the path of my life that God is leading me.

And He's an incredible guide.

Friday 27 June 2008

One word.

So I haven't been the most loyal of bloggers as of late. But I try, okay?

I'd like to say I've been really busy lately, and I certainly feel like I have been, but if you were to ask me: 'Trevor, what have you been so busy with that you can't write a short, simple (yet thought provoking) blog to your loyal fans and followers?'

I'd probably answer with something like: 'You're a liar. My blogs are never short.'

or something like that anyway.

But I SWEAR, I have been busy. I think. Just been up to a lot and can't really think of what I've been doing.

But I can sum up the last couple weeks for you in one word...

FUN!!

I have been having a BLAST the last few weeks. Just been so much fun. Hanging out with the people here has been the time of my life. Everyone's just so much fun... (not to say that you folks out in the Canadaland aren't, because you are!) A couple days ago it was Anna's birthday. So we went to this place close by to celebrate (literally down the corner from my road) and feel angry at everyone in general for never telling me this place existed! The food is amazing... they even have a pool table!! What else have people been hiding from me?!? So that was a lot of fun. Oh, and a few days before that I got a new housemate. Nick. He's American. Or a giant. Possibly an American giant. But we get along anyway, even though I'm Canadian non-giant.

The girls on the other compound got another housemate (total of 6 in one house!) and I MIGHT be getting another guy coming in on Sunday already. But no one really knows for sure...

A couple weeks ago we went to this hotel to use their pool. It cost 750 Naira for girls. And 1000 for guys. Don't ask me why I had to pay more. I have NO idea. Honest. Why would guys have to pay more?!? But it was nice. Except for the extreme sunburn. Everyone but Kathryn got FRIED. And we used sunscreen... I managed to have a nice red colour on my chest and stomach and that's it. So it wasn't too bad, no one could tell I looked like a tomato unless I took my shirt off. Which doesn't happen too often. It also came in handy for when I started to peel (in giant chunks at a time...) since no one had to be witness to that.

Last night was a blast too. I had the girls (Anna, Debbie, Janina, Julia, Krista and Samantha) down for dinner. I made spaghetti. It was pretty good, if I do say so myself. And after dinner as we were all hanging out, playing games and joking around, Kathy came by with a bag of goodies for me! My awesome family sent me stuff!! I felt like it was Sinterklaas (Christmas for any non-Dutchies reading this). SOOO much awesome stuff. Dropjies, King peppermints, Tootsie rolls, soup packages, chocolate sprinkles (I have NO idea how to spell that in Dutch), syrup for my pancakes (yay!! syrup costs more than $10 a bottle here, so I've never gotten it), Mac and cheese (awesome food for the bachelor pad), windmill cookies... But the best part was all the letters and pictures I got from everyone. Tracy made a really cute card with pictures of Clay and Tori. Sherri sent me a bunch of pictures of Sierra and Tavian. Sierra and Tavian drew/painted me some nice pictures as well. Cards from my siblings and my Oma... PLUS the card Stef sent me a couple months ago came with it (actually came IN the same bag. Don't ask me HOW that happened. I'm just glad it happened!) So that was pretty much the best night ever. Tons of fun with friends here. We were busting a gut laughing so much. Then my package and cards were just the icing on the cake of awesomeness.

I wanted to write an email to each person to thank them for them, but I don't have time right now (sorry!). I'm off in a little over an hour to drive 5 hours to say goodbye to Mike and Megan Ribbins and their super-fun kids Amira and Nico. Can't wait! But thank you to everyone who sent me stuff! You rock and I'll email you when I get back (tomorrow, probably). After that I've only got a couple weeks left here. Yikes! Then to England for a few days to hang out with my old housemate, Chris. London to visit Debbie (she leaves next weekend) and see Les Miserable. Ireland to visit Kathryn and Jayne. Holland to visit family and friends. Then Italy to visit the Pope and Caesar. THEN back to London to fly back home!!

One month and one day and I'll be back in the Great White North!!


eh?

Tuesday 10 June 2008

You can always get what you want.

"Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart."
Psalm 37:4

I think we tend to remember this text and then hold it against God when we don't get what we want. We get confused at God, we think "I did what YOU want, why haven't you given me what I want?"

But we're looking at it backwards. We're looking at it as if it said: "He will give you the desires of your heart when you delight yourself in the LORD."

The difference isn't huge, but vital to the meaning of the text. We look at this text and then think that God will give us what we want if we have faith in Him. Often people's faith are tried because of this. The person with the strongest faith is not going to get the Ferrari because of it. Our incorrect view of this text is dangerous. People who are sick, struggling with sin... are often told "if you have faith, God will heal/help..." Then, when this healing or the temptations don't stop, they begin to doubt. Their faith was strong, so WHY won't God help them?
"I held up my end of the bargain, your turn!"

Like I said, we often look at it wrong. The first part of the 'agreement' is to "delight yourself in the LORD". Not "think about what you want". We're thinking about what we want. We think that we can then get these things because of our faith, and if we don't, then either our faith isn't strong enough or God is going against His word. If we come to either of these conclusions, we've come to the wrong conclusions.

Once you've completed the first part of the text and are delighting in the LORD, you'll find that the desires of your heart change. You don't want the Ferrari anymore. You just want more of God.

And that's something He's dying to give.

When you delight in God, your heart desires to delight in God
and you get exactly what you want.

Saturday 7 June 2008

Pictures

Just a quick post to let you know I've upped some photos to Facebook.

Trip to Jalingo

Jos Wildlife Park

African thunderstorms

and, per my mom's request, some pictures of things I see and talk about, but you folks don't.

Enjoy!!

Wednesday 28 May 2008

Wedding photos

As requested, here are the pictures of the wedding I went to, then became the official photographer of.

Working on posting some of Jalingo (place I went to a couple weeks ago) and some other stuff. I've got Thursday and Friday off, so might do that then. But my laptop refuses to charge, so I'm limited to whenever there's power.

Which is pretty much never.

Monday 19 May 2008

News, car woes, questions and randomness.

You may have heard about an oil pipe in Nigeria bursting and killing 100 people a couple days ago. I just found out about it online, so I figured I should post in case anyone was wondering about it in relation to me. It happened in Lagos, which is much farther South West from me, in Jos. It sounds pretty bad, and apparently happened near a school and quite a number of children were killed as a result. Numbers vary depending on the source, but it remains a terrible event. Pipeline explosions aren't new to Nigeria, but they have normally happened as a result of people breaking the lines in order to steal the oil. This one happened during road construction.

In other news: an HIV-positive man has been sentenced to 35 years in prison for spitting on a policeman's face and mouth in the States. His spit was declared as a "deadly weapon." Now, while it's pretty gross, but in case you were wondering, HIV has NEVER been reported as been transmitted via saliva.
Ever.

For the policeman to have been infected from this man, the officer would have had open sores right where the spit landed and the saliva (which carries much lower quantities of virus compared to other body fluids, thus limiting the chance even more), would have had to entered these sores. Even then, there is still a greater chance of the officer NOT having contracted HIV than for. Contact with the virus in any situation isn't 100% sure of infection. It's actually closer to 1% in a risky one with fluid of a high HIV rate. Which this was not. Even if he managed to swallow the spit (even grosser), the virus would have been destroyed by his stomach acid. You could drink infected blood and not get infected. HIV infection is as much in your body when you swallow it as a marble is in your body when you shove it up your nose. It's there, probably feels pretty funny, but it's not going to make you sick. The odds were stacked hugely in the officer's favour. Like big time.

Does the guy really deserve 35 years in jail?

Granted, there were other factors. There usually is. He was drunk. He's resisted before. Resisted the paramedics' help. Gotten in fights with inmates, etc... So there was other stuff. He's an angry guy. But the main reason he was convicted was because of his spit. That was the focus. After he spat on the cop, he turned to him and said: "I have AIDS." So it seems he wanted to scare the cop into thinking he would get HIV. Which, since the man does have AIDS, is ridiculous. No one knows more about HIV/AIDS than someone who has it. In other words:

He bluffed.

And they bought it.
All the way to court.

And now he's going to jail.
For 35 years.
That's nuts. I'm 21. The guy is 42. I can't imagine 35 years in jail for drunken spittle.
35 years. (Tack a dozen more years on that and you have the life expectancy of a Nigerian)

Even if he did believe that the cop would get AIDS when he hocked a loogie in his face, it's silly that he's getting so much jail time for it. If I had fakus-diseasus and you got me pissed off so I pissed ON you (thinking I was punishing you by passing on what I got), I wouldn't go to jail for three and a half decades. It would be recognized as a childish bluff. Even if I thought I was passing it on, the fact is, I'm not.

You're not going to get fakus-diseasus from my pee.


I think the reason this has angered me so much (almost to the point of me taking a leak on my computer) is because of the difference in laws from a Western country to one like Nigeria. In a Western country, someone who has HIV, knows it, and sleeps with someone else without mentioning the infection, and then infects that person, he/she can be charged with a sexual offense, assault with a deadly weapon, assault, even murder if the person dies as a result. Compare this to places where up to 1/3 of all infected women were virgins before marriage and remained faithful during. Some don't even know their husbands are 'fooling around' and are infected. And even if they did, there's often very little they can do about it. In so many cultures the man is The Man. What he says, goes. That's it. We often do things like this, but on a smaller scale. But that's a blog for a different day. I think it's just ridiculous that someone can be jailed for causing no harm, when many are, in effect, actually killing people. What is it that makes us not care so much? What makes the life of an American worth SO much more than an African?


That's it for world news.
Now for ME news.

umm...

I had what I thought was a doughnut today. It kinda was. But in the centre, where tasty jelly is normally placed, was an entire hardboiled egg (shell off, obviously). I had no idea things like this existed. Who's been hiding these delicious doueggnuts from me?

What else...

The car I'm driving, a Peugeot station wagon, is a pain. Which goes along with any car I've ever driven. I tend to have bad luck with vehicles, starting in Canada and spilling over into Africa.

Case in points:

  • Flat tire at 1 am on the side of a dark highway.
  • Gas tank runs empty on the highway. (My dad never told me the light didn't work, and that when it's near E, it's actually on E.
  • Rear-ending a Land Rover that decided to stop in the middle of Plains Rd.
  • After honking to warn a guy who was driving in wrong lane (oncoming traffic), he resolves to thank me by cutting me off and hitting the front of the car. He then takes off on the highway and denies everything. I got his plates, but the cop didn't feel like driving out to London to talk to the guy, so I got shafted.
  • Sliding in the snow into a guardrail after giving space to an oncoming van. Which turned out to be my sister. Damaging what had been fixed after the hit-and-run.
  • Thought I had forgotten where I had parked my car in Toronto at 2 in the morning. While I was out searching for it, two people were shot (one killed) where it had been parked. It had been towed. I then had to search for where it had been towed to, taxi there, argue with the guy at the lot that it WAS there (I could see it, but he didn't have the paperwork, so therefore it wasn't there), then pay the fee and get home in time to get an hour and a half of sleep before I had to get up.
  • Flat tire first week in Nigeria.
  • John Orkar loans me his wife's car. The key breaks off the chain and gets locked inside the car. (Fortunately the hatch was open).
  • Driving with RURCON and the car decides to not stop applying gas. Which would have been a huge problem had it not been standard.
  • First morning I get to drive my 'new' Peugeot and the back tires seize up. I didn't make it out of the compound. Rear axle later gets replaced.
  • Horn stops honking. Not a problem in Canada, but essential in Nigeria. I'm not kidding. Driving actually became harder. It's the only way to stop the motorcyclists from getting hit when they constantly cut you off. Plus it's how you get the guard's attention to open the gate. Had to get OUT of the car to knock on the door to let me in. If I wanted exercise, I wouldn't be driving a car in the first place...
  • Saturday: I wake up with a flat tire. Completely flat. Take it off, put on the spare and get it fixed (for less than a dollar!) While I'm replacing it, I notice fluid having leaked all over the wheel. Plus, two lug nuts don't tighten. This is going to be fixed tomorrow. Hopefully.
  • What next??
This is my view from the inside of my car. Which may give you some insight as to how everything is under the hood...

Yes, that is a giant shatter-crack on the left. Yes, that is a giant crack diagonally down the centre. And YES, those are stickers in the centre-right. For insurance. They have to be there.

And people wonder why accidents happen...

PS, That large, button-like thing in the middle of the steering wheel? That's nothing. To honk the horn, you need to pull the signal indicator towards you. This is not unusual here.

Oh, and guess where the ignition is...





That's pretty much it from me. Just have a few questions for you.

What book did you just read?
What book are you currently reading?
What book are you going to read next?

I just finished Velvet Elvis. Which I recommend to be your next read. (I'll blog about how much I enjoyed this book later).
I'm currently reading Long Walk to Freedom, the autobiography of Nelson Mandela. (But I've technically been reading it for months now - it's a long book, okay!).
I'm not sure what I'm going to read next. What do you recommend?

Thursday 15 May 2008

Filling in the gap.

Hey all! I've been pretty quiet for a while, and there's a good reason. Honest. (It's not like I've run out of things to say).
Allow me to explain my silence to Justine, and anyone else who raised an eyebrow at the lack of posts.

Like all good stories, it began with a song...

That song was Hard Sun, by Eddie Vedder, the guy from Pearl Jam. It's a good song. I really like it. I was listening at home once (in Canada) and my younger brother Jamie told me that it's a song from a movie he really wanted to watch called Into the Wild. (It's a true story about this guy who gives up the life he has to go live in the Alaskan wild). He showed me the trailer. It looked really good. So I wanted to watch it too. But it wasn't in theatres anymore. Making it a lot harder to watch. For Sinterklaas, I bought Jamie the book that inspired the movie. He read it, then was generous enough to let me borrow it and take it to Africa with me. I read a good chunk of it before I left and finished it soon after arriving. It just made me want to watch the movie even more. Before I left, I checked on British Airways to see what movies they had on the flight, and, wouldn't you know it! Into the Wild was on there! So I was pretty pumped. But, as it turned out, Into the Wild was the one movie on there they DIDN'T play. And it was the only one I wanted to watch. So I was disappointed.

Then I get here. I've finished reading the book. I have the song on my laptop. Every time I listen to the song I want to watch the movie. So I did what I've done dozens of times back home: I downloaded. I got the movie. So I was happy. But a couple months later (a couple weeks ago), the internet turned off on our entire compound. APPARENTLY, downloading a movie owned by Paramount Pictures is not looked too kindly on by our internet providers. So they cut us off for a week. That was the 'warning'. So, I don't think people at the office here were saying anything too nice about me for a while...

Then, right after that, I went on a trip with Beacon of Hope to Jalingo, in Eastern Nigeria (close to Cameroon) for a week. That's the second week of silence. Now I'm back. And there's internet again. But not in my house for the moment (as punishment for being naughty), so I probably won't be able to post pictures or blog as much for a little bit.

Do you want to know the real kicker?

I still haven't watched it.



To apologize for my previously unexplained silence, here's a couple of a bunch of really cool pictures I took during a nighttime thunderstorm in Jalingo. I'll post them (and others) as soon as I can. If I don't break the internet again...

Saturday 26 April 2008

A short post.

Fooled you!

I always intend to write a short post. It never ends up that way though. You know you love it.
Another post of random thoughts and updates, jumping back and forth with no real structure.

To spice this long blog up a bit, here's a picture showing how much I stick out on a regular basis.


I've been pretty busy lately. Starting up at Beacon of Hope and getting shown the ropes for there. Pretty interesting. Beacon of Hope is connected to TEKAN (acronym that translated, means Fellowship of Christian Churches in Nigeria) which is a collection of several Christian denominations here. Beacon is involved throughout Nigeria with HIV/AIDS awareness, training, testing… etc. One thing they started this week is a course they are teaching to pastors involved in the different denominations all about HIV/AIDS plus what their role is as a leader to do with it. The idea being, they will then teach what they learn in this 20 week course to their congregations - hopefully removing the stigmatism that so often follows when anyone openly shares a positive HIV status. This stigmatism is a HUGE problem. Depending where the person lives, if they become open with being positive, their lives can be ruined. People will refuse to buy things from them, ending any income. Friends will leave. People have been beaten to death by their family just for saying they are infected. I cannot even begin to fathom this. I can't imagine how hard it would be to build up the nerve just to be tested. I can't imagine how hard it would be to wait the 15 minutes it takes to get the result. I can't imagine sitting there when someone I don't know tells me I tested positive. I can't imagine finding out that I have a disease that, even with all the treatment, will eventually kill me. I can't imagine walking home in such despair. I can't imagine needing more support at any other time in my life. I can't imagine building up the courage to tell my family and loved ones that I have HIV. I can't imagine how I would be able to even finish one sentence without being overwhelmed. I can't imagine my family - the ones I love and who are supposed to love me unconditionally - I can't imagine them murdering me before the symptoms even show .

I can't imagine any of this happening.

This is, obviously, an extreme. But the stigmatism is almost always still there. People lose their jobs, their livelihoods, their friends, their families, their lives. They are afraid to find out. It may take someone a year just to build up the confidence to get tested. Testing takes only a drop of blood. Hard to imagine that something in one drop of your own blood can lead to your life being ruined, even ended.

Chris, my housemate for the past three months, has taken off for home. He flew out for Britain last Friday. I tagged along with him to Abuja (a good three hour drive) Thursday afternoon. Chris and I partied in Abuja with Mike and Megan and their adorable kids Amira and Nico (don't challenge Amira in wrestling, she will beat you EVERY time… trust me). We stayed at the Ribbens for a bit (had some great burgers), then around nineish Mike asked us if we wanted to go out to a store to get some snacks and drinks.

This is when I started going into culture shock. Which you might find a little odd.

When I first came a little over three months ago, I was in Abuja for a couple days. It was a bit different from what I was used to, but still pretty Western. So it wasn't TOO different, so I didn't think anything of it. It was all more of a novelty than anything else. But now, after living three months in Jos, a very African city, it really hit me. I've been living in a city with no streetlights, where you don't walk anywhere past 7, where there is often more time without electricity than with, where air conditioning is rare, motorcycles are taxis, curfew is 10, a stoplight is that guy in the orange shirt telling you if you can go... you get the idea. So, after three months, you get pretty used to that being normal. Driving around to a store at 9pm was not. The streets were lit. There were those electronic TV screen ads on the side of the road. There were… people. Stores weren't just open, they were busy! It seemed surreal. We went to a department store (Park 'n' Shop!) where there were shelves of… everything. Food! Toys! Bread! Cookies! Drinks! They even had an entire wine section. Upstairs they were selling microwaves, fridges, laptops and the biggest plasma TV I've ever seen in my life. This is far from unordinary in Canada. The average mall has a store for each of these things. But being in Jos for 3 months and visiting other areas in Nigeria like villages that don't even have holes for toilets), you come to think of the entire country being the same. It's surreal to see such a modern city in a country full of villages without clean water or toilets. When I had first left Abuja three months ago for Jos, Kyle had told me: "you're finally leaving the West."
Now I understand.

It makes me wonder. I feel I adjusted pretty well to the Jos life (in my opinion anyway). To losing so many of the luxuries I enjoyed back home (like having both a fridge and a microwave in my bedroom…) But seeing how things are in other areas around the world I've realized at how little we actually need. You miss things at first, but you get used to them being gone. They're replaced with more meaningful things. Things that challenge you. Things that make you learn. Make you adapt. Make you think. Make you better.

So I wondered: do we adapt quicker to losing things, or gaining things? Both seem to be pretty quick. But adapting to loss makes us grow, while adapting to a gain seems to make us soft.

My younger brother, Jamie, had joked about when I would come back, I would be like Schindler at the end of Schindler's List. (Not the END end of the movie, he wasn't joking about people putting flowers on my grave or something morbid like that). Near the end of the movie, Schindler is looking at things he spent money on and saying about how those things could have helped him save more Jews from the Nazis. Jamie joked how I'd come home and pick up something of mine and hold it up saying something along the lines of "this could have fed anothe. This DVD…" I thought it was funny (not to make light of the tragedy the movie depicted, but rather on how Africa would affect me), but I also suspected there was truth to it all. Right now, I don't know how I can go back home without looking at everything I have (couple thousand dollars worth of movies, for instance) without thinking about how I should/could have used my God-given money more appropriately. God has given me more money than I needed. Money I could have given away to someone who could use it to live. $20 is a LOT of money to a LOT of people. It means a lot more than we'll probably ever understand to a lot more people than we'll probably ever comprehend. $20 in Canada won't buy you a new DVD, but here, the equivalent (a bit under 2500 Naira) is quite a bit. I have someone who comes in to do my laundry, which I would never have done if I had a machine - all done by hand and I don't have the time. Becky can use the 800 Naira she gets for a day's work more than I can. She would have to work more than 3 days just to buy a movie in Canada. If she didn't have any expenses. Which, since she has a baby, I don't think is true.

So, I doubt me coming home will be as dramatic as Schindler's List, but I know I won't be the same. I'm not the same now as I was. I knew when I was still in Canada and planning on leaving that I wouldn't be the same guy coming back. I don't mean the light tan I've gotten, I mean the way I think. The way I look at things. What I do with my spare time, how I talk to people, how I read my Bible, what I pray for… everything. I know God has me here for a reason. I'm still not sure what that reason is. God could have a plan for me to be here for years. He could have a plan for me to spend every day of the rest of my life in Canada. Who am I to disagree with God? I just pray I don't resist too much to what He does have planned.

Henry Blackaby once wrote: "Some people say: 'God will never ask me to do something I can't do.' I have come to the place in my life that, if the assignment I sense God is giving me is something that I know I can handle, I know it is probably not from God. The kind of assignments God gives in the Bible are always God-sized. They are always beyond what people can do, because He waits to demonstrate His nature, His strength, His provision and His kindness to His people and to a watching world. This is the only way the world will ever come to know Him." God gives us challenges He knows we can't handle. Unless we come to Him. God makes us grow through challenges. We're challenged so we can grow. If you spent you're entire life having everything you asked for given to you, you'd crumble at the first difficulty you faced. Don't avoid a difficulty, it's really God giving you the opportunity to grow.

Hard to imagine I'd be almost home right now if I only stayed the initial 3 months. I feel like I'm just getting used to everything. Be weird to be going home so soon. When I think back to when I first got here, it seems so long ago. But all the time in between has just flown by.

On a completely different note, I ate something off a banana leaf for the first time ever this week. That's definitely something that should have been on, and now scratched off, my To-do list. It was good.

I now have my Nigerian drivers license. It's actually kinda scary how easily I got it. No test. But I did show my Canadian license, so I guess they're assuming I know how to drive. At least I hope that the average Nigerian can't get a license that easy. But going on how a lot of them drive, I wouldn't be surprised. I'm sharing a Peugeot wagon with another guy here. It's pretty sweet. Not the car, it's a piece of junk. But being able to drive myself around. The car is... drivable. But wouldn't pass any safety laws. But it works and it's better than nothing, so I'm not complaining.

What else, what else...

I went to my first Nigerian wedding today. No offense, but in comparison, Canadian weddings are a bit boring. It was so energetic, a lot of singing... Weddings in Canada can be so stiff and dull. I can't remember the last wedding I've been to that was FUN. And it seems that's what it should be. It's an enjoyable occasion. A couple is being united under God. Laugh! Sing! Cheer! Yell! Dance! It's a happy occasion! Not that we don't enjoy our weddings in Canada, we just somehow feel that we can't express our emotions to the full extent of how they are affecting us.

But don't worry Rick and Natalie and Jon and Stef, you're weddings won't be boring. You're all too much fun for that to happen.

After the wedding, my ride had to show the wedding party where exactly to go for pictures. When we got there, they realized that the photographer didn't come with. So then I became the 'official' photographer. Which was weird. Since I wasn't actually invited to the wedding (not that you GET invited to a Nigerian wedding, it's an open invitation to ANYone...) but I didn't even know WHO the bride and groom were. I was just there because I wanted to see what a Nigerian wedding was like. Then I became the photographer. So that was kinda neat.

Oh, and check out my rock climbing pictures! We went twice to this huge pile of rocks (LOTS of rocks in Nigeria) and climbed them. Quite tricky to get to the top. We were all pretty sore the next day.

Wednesday 16 April 2008

Snaps

I uploaded pictures.
Not much, just from St. Patrick's Day and the Worship Over. Kinda give ya a feel of some of the random stuff that goes on.

I know I'm way behind.

Here's some more 'teasers' of pictures to come:
This is (apparently) the highest point in all of Plateau. Maybe even Nigeria. You know what? I'm just going to say this is the highest point in the world.

Friday 11 April 2008

brb

In 3 more months!

I got my visa extension.

I'm pretty pumped.

Hopefully I'll be able to get a good night's sleep now.

:)

Enjoy this picture of a sign. I did.

Tuesday 8 April 2008

Finally!

Yay! Pictures!

It's taken me a little while. Ok, quite a while... but I finally have some pictures posted. It's taken me literally all night, so you better be happy. I hope to be in bed by 1.

Most are from Jemkur, which is a remote village in Plateau State (state I'm in). Because of the horrible roads, it took 5 hours to get there. Plateau State isn't even that big. To give you a bit of a frame of reference, Ontario is bigger than all of Nigeria. (With significantly less people). One of the guys from RURCON, plus a guy from another organization, called TASTE, went to this village to show them how to build a sanitary toilet. Many people previously just went in a field or even a stream (which they also use for drinking water). So it's definitely something they need. The idea was to get the villagers to do the work themselves so they would be able to know how to build more, plus it would get them involved and they would be dedicated to the project more. Just giving handouts to people makes them dependent on them and takes away any initiative for them to do certain things themselves.

The toilets themselves are an Indian design (as in from India, not Native). It's a bowl that can be flushed with 1.5 L of water. The pipe splits off into two holes, only one of which is used at a time. After a couple years, the second hole is used and the first one can be used for fertilizer (talk about win-win!)

The village was pretty cool. Not literally, I got burnt, but pretty neat. They don't see white people very often. I scared some kids... But once I pulled out the digital camera, they warmed up to me.

Jemkur pictures are
and here.

Other pictures I have are of Yankari Game Reserve. This place is technically farther than Jemkur, yet takes less than half the time to get there, thanks to good roads. It's a lot of fun there, went with Chinyere, Monica, Janina and Chris and John. We didn't see a whole lot of animals, besides baboons and warthogs. And a lot of birds...
But there was an elephant!
Behind some trees.
It may have been a rock.

The hot spring is what was the most fun there. I mentioned it in my last post I believe. Now you can have a better taste of what it was like in some of my pictures. But I have to say the second trip we took was better. Especially for pictures. So check these ones out, but just so ya know, there's better ones on their way! Eventually. *Edit! Just uploaded the pictures of the second Yankari trip! Ch-ch-ch-check it out now.*

Yankari part 1

CRWRC had it's annual spiritual conference this weekend. It was great. Got a chance to play with kids. Which is always fun. Especially Nico, Mike and Megan's little toddler. He's a lot of fun. I kinda 'kidnapped' him a couple times...

Conference was good. Got the green light from Beacon of Hope. Now I just need my visa. Hopefully that will come soon. Praying it does!

No sermon today.
I need something to talk about tomorrow...

Wednesday 2 April 2008

Two part post.

(This post is another post in two parts. The second part has to do with Africa and pictures. Feel free to skip until there if I start to bore you).

Doing something for yourself (aka, selfish) is arguably basis to end whatever it is you are doing. If I was a boss, and I gave you a promotion, I'd be doing a good thing. But if the real reason I gave you the promotion was because it was the only way I would get a promotion, my halo will have dimmed a few watts. I'd have done it for myself, not because you needed the raise. You probably wouldn't complain because, hey, it's a raise! But I think it raises a moral dilemma. If you do something for yourself (something selfish), but are indirectly doing something good for someone else, is the act itself good?
In other words: does the end justify the means?

It has always bothered me (in interviews or the like), when someone has been asked why they help such and such people, or donate or whatever - and they answer:

"it makes me feel good"

To me, it just seems like the wrong reason. It seems pretty selfish. I've always wanted to tell that person "this person is in need, this person is starving, this person is DYING… and the only reason you want to help him is because it makes you feel good?!?" What about their right to live, even if it doesn't directly make YOU happy? What about the Biblical mandate to help those who need it, whether you benefit from it or not? To me, help/aid/donating involves a sacrifice.
Getting joy out of helping is not wrong whatsoever.
But if the reason WHY I were to donate, give support, feed a homeless person - if the reason is to give myself a pat on the back, to get that 'warm, fuzzy feeling' I think I'd be doing it for the completely wrong reason. The Biblical idea of helping those in need is to put them first.

Often, I think the reason people say this, or give this impression, is not because they themselves are selfish. They're just aware that our society is. We are focused on our individual happiness. To try convince someone that they should donate because it would make someone else happy just doesn't seem to have as much appeal as donating money because it will make YOU happy. And we'd much rather make ourselves happy - if the option is there.

The good Samaritan is the prime example of helping someone in need in the way we are supposed to. He put the injured man first. He went to his aid. He got down, got all bloody picking him up off the side of the road and helped him to the city. He paid a good deal of cash to see that he would get better. He put the injured man first. If the Samaritan had done it so that he himself could feel good, he would have been putting himself first. He would've told everyone he passed that he picked the man up off the street. Maybe have even asked for help, so he could still get the glory but not get as dirty. He'd be telling people that he saved a life. He would've called up the papers to let them know what he did. He would have wanted everyone to know that he breached the huge cultural gap. That he gave up his hard earned cash to pull that man to safety. He helped his enemy. He would've been trying to puff himself up before everyone. But he didn't. Because he put the other man first. He gave things up. Money, obviously. But he also gave up his trip. He was traveling somewhere, possibly in the opposite direction than he brought the man, and gave up getting there on time. Maybe he lost the big business deal. Point is, he gave up something he didn't want to, without getting something in return. He gave up where he was going, what he was doing, and his lunch money - all for the injured man.

To REALLY help someone, to REALLY give yourself, to REALLY donate…

it has to hurt.

If we're not hurting...
we're not giving enough.

Replace 'warm and fuzzy' with passion; a burning desire to help others.

Here ends my 'sermon' as I'm sure Sherri would put it.

Now, onto African things…

The CRC has an annual spiritual conference this weekend (Thursday to Sunday), so I probably won't be updating during that. Not that I've been the most loyal updater lately… I've been trusted with the daunting task of supplying peanuts or popcorn on Thursday as snack food for the group. I don't know if I can handle that. During the conference, I hope to be able to talk to people from Beacon of Hope (the organization I hope to be working with in a couple weeks) and CRWRC staff about me staying on to work with Beacon of Hope and hopefully get my visa woes figured out as soon as possible. If this doesn't get figured out, I might be leaving in less than two weeks. If not, I won't be home for about 4 months from now. Which is really weird. Should I start getting ready to go home, or should I start settling in? I don't think I'm ready to go back yet (disappointing, I know), but we'll see what the Lord has planned. I've heard a response from someone who was quite excited at the idea of me working with Beacon of Hope. Even said something along the lines it being 'an answer to a prayer'.

No pressure...

Another disappointment: still no real new pictures up at the moment. Nothing really 'African' anyway. Some of you have been whining about this *cough*Sherri*cough* but you'll just have to suck in that lip until I have the chance. Which may be soon. But then again, may not. I'm in Africa, so I'm doing things in African time. Crazy people going by your clocks, rushing to get things done. Slow down! Take a breather!

To keep you (somewhat) satisfied, here's
a few teaser pictures of the Yankari game reserve and hot spring we went to recently.

We're all animals.
I'm a tiger!


Chris and I take monkey in the middle very seriously.

This is the hot spring. It is awesome.

Also, some pictures of the eclipse I took a while back. Technically in Nigeria, so there. Also a basketball game and the carnival at the local school. While I'm at it, here's some of my favourite and random shots. That should keep y'all busy for a while.

Thursday 27 March 2008

Something that tickled my fancy.

Something I read the other day made me grin.

Apparently, scientists cannot prove that love exists.

This is interesting because we know love exists - whether someone in a lab coat can prove it or not.
And I thought of how so many people rely on what scientists say to be truth.
Scientists say God doesn't exist and therefore believe He doesn't.

Then I thought of 1 John 4:
God is love.

I may not be a math scholar, but it really add up... if God can't be proven to exist by scientists (who have the final say on everything for some reason) and people believe this because science says so, shouldn't the same be for love? If love can't be proven:
Shouldn't we all believe love doesn't exist?
Shouldn't everyone who's married just give up on their spouses, (since they were all just pretending anyway)?
Shouldn't textbooks be rewritten saying love is an old-fashioned concept that only radicalists believe in?
Shouldn't there be an issue of TIME magazine with the heading: "Love is dead"?

I also wondered: who's paying these guys? Who funded a group of well-educated people to prove or disprove something like love?
I picture some rich, lonely old miser on his deathbed needing validation his life wasn't wasted. Probably the same guy who paid a different group to disprove God's existence.
He's probably laying there with a smirk, thinking "You told me to pursue God. I proved He doesn't exist! You told me to go after love, I proved that doesn't exist either!! My money proved all of you wrong! I LOVE being right!!!" Then he'll probably have a heart attack from the irony.

Maybe scientists should stop trying to disprove the existence of God/love and focus on trying to, I don't know...
stop AIDS.

Tuesday 18 March 2008

Sitting, waiting, wishing.

I've got no wack of pictures to post. Relax, I'm a busy guy. Now, while I've got you all believing that, I tell you about the party last night.

Yesterday was St. Patrick's day. And since there are at like 10 other volunteers from Ireland around, a St. Patrick's day party was inevitable. And when I say 10, I mean 4. It was at the girls' house on the other compound. I'm not sure why I'm bothering to say it was at the girls', since Chris and I are the only guys here; if it's not at our house, it's got to be at a girl's. We were outnumbered by about 20-2.

So yeah, there was a St. Patrick's Day party.

Cookies and sugar-high.
Pop and teeth-rot.
Karaoke and embarrassment.
Microphones and bleeding ears.
Green and more green.
Music and Riverdance.
Girls and chick songs.
Irish people and car explosions.
Cameras and blackmail.

Overall, a shamrocking good time.

Later, after we got kicked out, I went home to read a bit of this great book I've been lent. If you want to walk on water, you've got to get out of the boat by John Ortberg. I thought it was pretty fitting that he quotes a prayer by St. Patrick and I happen to read it on his day.

I arise today through God's strength to pilot me:
God's might to uphold me,
God's wisdom to guide me,
God's eye to look before me
God's ear to hear me,
God's word to speak for me,
God's hand to guard me.
Christ be with me, Christ before me, Christ behind me,
Christ in me, Christ beneath me, Christ above me,
Christ on my right, Christ on my left,
Christ when I lie down, Christ when I sit down, Christ when I arise.
Christ in the heart of everyone who thinks of me,
Christ in the mouth of everyone who speaks of me,
Christ in every eye that sees me,
Christ in every ear that hears me.
I arise today
Through a mighty strength, the invocation of the Trinity.

I found this prayer, and several things John Ortberg says in this book to have really hit home for me right now. Here I am in Africa - waiting, hoping, praying - that God will make it clear to me what He has planned for me. As the 3 months quickly come to an end and my attempts to add another 3 months onto it seem so difficult, I've felt myself growing impatient and helpless. And I don't LIKE that I feel impatient or helpless. I know I AM helpless without God. I know I need to trust Him and have faith that He's got a plan and will reveal it. Eventually.

It's times like this that I know Christianity isn't a human concept. Everything we make, we make as simple, easy and quick as possible. Fast-food wasn't fast enough, so now you don't even have to get out of your car. If Christianity was an invention by a group of people, it would be easy and getting easier. It would be simple. It would be quick. I haven't found it to be any of those things. We can't just sit in our cars (lives, jobs, careers, families...), drive up to the window every once and a while (church service, Bible study, prayer...) and expect a quick meal to fill us up. That 'meal', like fast-food, is often junk. If you eat it all the time, you'll get fat, lazy and unhealthy in faith. I hope my body never becomes unhealthy, but I pray my faith never does.

Some other things John Ortberg has said:

John Wesley wrote that Christians have just three rules to follow regarding material possessions:
Make all you can - save all you can - give all you can.
A friend of mine [John Ortberg's friend, not mine] wrote that apparently American [I think I can add Canadian, European...] evangelicals have decided that two out of three ain't bad.
You could make a secret, sacrificial gift this week - that's an eternal investment. Maybe it's your time and your talent.
You can drift: get up, go to work, come home, eat supper, watch TV, retire, and die.
Or, you can take each moment and say, "God, this is yours." You can offer him your spiritual giftedness - not compared with anyone else - as fully honed and developed as you can get it, identified with pristine clarity, cultivated with relentless perseverance, deployed with unstoppable vigor, submitted with sacrificial humility, and celebrated with raucous.

This is what I want to do. This is what I pray to do. I want to offer myself to God to do whatever he wants with me. So why the delay? Why do I still have unanswered questions??
I think it's because I'm not ready.

A couple chapters later:

Why does God make us wait? If he can do anything, why doesn't he bring us relief and help and answers now?
At least in part, to paraphrase Ben Patterson, what God does in us while we wait is as important as what we're waiting for.


and then a couple pages later:

Waiting in the Lord is a confident, disciplined, expectant, active, and sometimes painful clinging to God.
Waiting on the Lord is the continual, daily decision to say, "I will trust you, and I will obey you. Even though the circumstances of my life are not turning out the way I want them to, and may never turn out the way I would choose, I am betting everything I have on you. I have no plan B."


God's plan is far better than mine. I know this. I just need to believe it.

Now I'm going to ask you to do something. Something a bit unusual for in a blog. Even more unusual for me to ask.

As I try to find my purpose, as I come to terms with the fact that God's plan is FAR better than anything I can think of, as I try to be patient for His plan to come, as I try to work out staying another 3 months, as I try to figure out how I can best do whatever I'm faced with, as I try to face whatever is put in before me, as I'm going though this spiritual and emotional struggle... As all this is going on - I ask that you pray for these things for me.

Thursday 13 March 2008

African lion safari.

So, I know I said I would have some pictures up this week...
I was wrong.
I apologize.
I hope you can forgive me.

Reason is...

I'm going on an African lion safari tomorrow and not coming back until Saturday.

Not that one in Hamilton.
This is the real deal.

A lion safari IN Africa.


It's okay to be jealous.

Tuesday 11 March 2008

What are you fighting for?

Heyo!

I'm back from my trip with Albert. We traversed Nigeria for the week. Was quite fun. Should have some pictures up by the end of the week. Not quite as cool as the pictures from when I went to the EKA, but still pretty good. If I do say so myself. I'll post the exciting story stuff with the pictures. So, instead of pictures this time, you get blog. Enjoy!

Paul was a really smart guy. I've never really sat down and counted before, but he wrote a lot of the books in the New Testament - Romans, 1 & 2 Corinthians, Galatians, Ephesians, Philippians, Colossians, 1 & 2 Thessalonians, 1 & 2 Timothy, Titus, Philemon and maybe Hebrews. That's a lot. I've thought about writing a book, but 14?!? That's nuts. Now they're technically letters, but they hold a lot more useful information than most books I've ever read. So they're books in my book. I've been reading Paul's books quite a bit lately. Especially the ones he wrote to the different churches. Mainly because I'm still hung up on that topic I touched on a little while ago on what is THE church. Hate to bore you, but I'm at it again, but with a bit of a different approach. And for those of you who are only interested in Africa stuff, there's some African references and subjects thrown in here, so you'll have to read the whole thing to get what you want!

Now, I'm not expecting anything I say in here to be Earth-shattering or a complete revelation to you. But it is to me. This could all be totally elementary to you. This is more for me to get my thoughts out than it is anything else. I may say 'we believe' but I really often mean 'I believeD', not 'you believe'. This could all be heresy to you (hope not!) But this is all important to me right now. I'm learning a ton about faith, religion and God. To be more accurate:

I'm discovering how much more I have to learn about faith,
re-learning and un-learning a lot about religion
and I'm learning about God more than I thought I could every day.

I'm not what you would call a die-hard Canadian Reformed person. I don't mean that I don't agree with Canadian Reformed doctrine, that's not it at all. What I do mean is that when someone asks me my faith, I'd rather talk about how I try to live Christ-like. That I'm a Christ-follower. That God paid the ultimate sacrifice for me. I would much rather say this than try to explain to someone the difference between Canadian Reformed and any number of other denominations. When someone asks me my faith, I'd much rather talk more about God's impact in my life and less on the divisions in Christianity. You might say that to be Canadian Reformed IS to be a Christ-follower, and I'd agree with you, but to declare "I am Canadian Reformed!" - like that would explain everything - that just isn't in me. There's a whole lot more Christ-followers in the world today than there are members of the Canadian Reformed denomination. When someone asks your faith and you tell them your denomination, it only leads to confusion and the topic strays from the sacrifice God made to how we can't get along. I feel that in cutting ourselves up into little groups and refusing to go outside them we are feeding Satan's desire to create conflict - creating divisions, unnecessary divisions. I won't say denominations aren't necessary. They are. We're human. We won't get along on this earth. Ever. So we need them to get along in smaller circles. What frustrates me is how these smaller circles refuse to get along with each other.

Raise any eyebrows yet?
Don't worry, there's still time.

I find that how C.S. Lewis describes Christians and the body of Christ to be just what I had been trying to say earlier: "Christians are Christ's body, the organism through which he works. Ever addition to that body enables Him to do more…
"The whole mass of Christians are the physical organism through which Christ acts - that we are his fingers and muscles, the cells of His body…

"Christianity thinks of human individuals not as mere members of a group or items in a list, but as organs in a body - different from one another and each contributing what no other could…

"you and [other Christians] are different organs, intended to do different things"

To declare a specific denomination to be a part of THE church and another not is to do exactly what we've been commanded not to do in the Bible: judge. We know that to judge an individual is wrong, but we seem to be able to judge groups of individuals without a second thought.

Like I said, I've been reading a lot by Paul. Specifically, Romans 14-15 has been standing out in my mind. Hopefully if you've read this far and you've seen how much farther you've got to go, you won't mind reading a couple chapters of the Bible. Here it is in The Message. It really stuck out for me. Paul is telling us to do everything to God's glory, and if someone does it differently, it doesn't really matter, because they're giving God glory. In other words, there's more than one way to give God glory - even if they're opposite things. For example: dancing. (It can be a touchy subject in Canadian Reformed circles - probably why I picked it as an example). One may feel that dancing is sexual or offensive; something worldly and to be avoided. While another may feel that dancing helps the individual express their love for God through their body. The first person is bringing glory to God by avoiding things he/she feels are worldly and the second person is bringing glory to God by expressing his/herself through rhythm. Neither is sinning, neither is wrong. Unless one starts to judge the other. This method obviously doesn't apply to everything. One can't say they're brining glory to God by sleeping around… This applies only to the smaller details of things, not to something that has an obvious yay or nay in the Bible. To be blunt, God is pretty clear in the Bible about the important stuff like salvation. If two different people can 'prove' opposite points on the same subject through Biblical passages, it's obviously something that's not vital to salvation, so agree to disagree and get along. "If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone" Romans 12:18

Let me give another example, one with less controversy. Jaywalking. It's illegal. (I think, humour me). To jaywalk in Canada is to break the law, something as a Christian we are not supposed to do, as we are to respect the government God has placed over us. So if you were to jaywalk in Canada, you would, in effect be sinning. Law is law, even if it seems silly. But in another country, like Nigeria, jaywalking is not illegal. So you can jaywalk to your hearts extent (unless you get hit by a car) without having broken any laws (or sinned). Two people have done the same thing in this case, but the one by doing it has sinned, and the other has not. It would be completely unreasonable for the person from Canada to call the Nigerian a sinner for having crossed the road on the basis of the Canadian law, just as it would be unreasonable for the Nigerian to consider the Canadian 'old-fashioned' for refusing to jaywalk. To the Canadian, jaywalking is wrong. To the Nigerian, it's not. The Canadian uses the cross-walk, the Nigerian goes in the next break in traffic. Both get to the other side. I trust you can see where I'm going with this.

You may feel it is a sin not to pray before a meal. That to not pray is to not thank God for the food He has provided you. I find that when I do not pray (as a conscious decision, not a slip of the mind), when I choose not to pray, that I thank God for each bite - the entire meal becomes focused on God, as well as me consciously thanking and praising God for the nourishment He has given me throughout the entire day (leading up to, during and after the meal), rather than a reflexive "I'm supposed to pray now because that's what I've done since I was a kid and that's what I'm supposed to do or else it'll rot in my stomach". I'm not saying my different way is better. I tend to take prayer for granted and I think I'm safe to say that I'm not alone. (I don't think I'd be too off target to suppose that you've once forgotten to pray for a meal and felt that twinge of guilt disappear as soon as you quickly rambled off the Lord's Prayer). It would be wrong for someone to notice I've not prayed for a meal and tell me that I have to pray before I eat - even though I am giving God glory in a different manner. Different is not necessarily wrong. Prayer here in Nigeria is much more active for everyone in the room. If you feel strongly about a point in the prayer, it's not unusual to say "amen!", "yes" or just "mmm" during the prayer. We often recite the end of a prayer together. Jesus never taught us to pray like this, so you could, theoretically, argue against it. There doesn't seem to be a need to grunt in approval during a prayer, so I'd agree that it’s not necessary. But on the other hand, is it necessary to remain quiet? You might be wondering where I'm going with this. You're probably tired of this long blog and just want to hear about how I crossed the Benue River on a barge last week or how it rained two nights (rare this time of year). You might even be thinking I'm not even making a point. That whether or not you recite 'Amen' at the end of a prayer is trivial. But that is my point. It is trivial. It's two different ways to bring praise to God. One way works for one person, one way works for another. The African feels that prayer is expressive, while the Canadian may feel that prayer is to be reverent, and therefore silent. One way is not better or worse than the other as BOTH bring glory to God. There is no way to 'sort of' bring glory to God - you either are or you aren't. So don't judge a denomination based on the specific way they bring glory to God. First off, it's not your place. "blessed is the man who does not condemn himself by what he approves" v. 22b. To put it another way, you're condemning yourself when you think there is only a specific way to bring God glory; that there is only one TRUE way to worship God. There is more than way to skin a cat. There's more than one way to worship. While the manner in which I pray for a meal may be unusual, it's not taking glory AWAY from God, and therefore no reason for conflict.

God didn't create anything wrong or sinful in and of itself. Go through Genesis, you won't find a passage saying "and God created _______ and saw that He made a mistake, but thought He'd leave it so that years later one denomination can point its fingers at another and single them out as being evil". Maybe I took that farther than I needed, but what I'm trying to say is that God didn't create anything evil. It's what we do with His creation that makes it evil. As soon as you throw a human in the mix we mess it up. We're the ones who turn God's wonderful creation into a place of sin. Take one thing on it's own and it's good. Your hand. It's good. It's amazing. (Mine's a little on the skinny and knobby side, but I'm sure yours is really nice.) Fingers are bendy. Thumbs are opposable. But as soon as you bend those fingers and oppose that thumb and smack someone up-side the face, you've got sin. This doesn't mean we should conclude that hands are evil and we can't use them anymore. (Just try to type a reply about how you think I'm way off with this blog using your elbows.) Because hands CAN be used for sin doesn't make them sinful, it just means we need to stop hitting people and use our hands for good. God created us all and will use us all for good - if only we could stop slapping each other and hold hands. Denominations have their differences, but the beautiful thing is that we can work around them.

Paul talks about food a lot in Romans 14, that's because food happens to be what the Romans we getting hung up on. They judged other people based on that they had been brought up to believe certain food was unholy. We judge other denominations based on what they teach on any number of equally trivial matters. For some reason we think that the specific way we do something is the way to do something. There is a difference in what is important to YOUR faith, YOUR relationship with God and with ANYone ELSE's relationship with God.

"For if we live, we live to the Lord; and if we die, we die to the Lord. Therefore, whether we live or die, we are the Lord's" v8, NKJV
We're God's, not our denomination's. Something I've always found kind of an example of our stubbornness against other denominations is when many of us go camping out of our denomination's circles. Rather than enjoy the fellowship of believers in a different denomination's congregation in worship to God, we will listen to an old sermon on tape or skip altogether. Many feel it would be 'wrong' to attend a different denomination's service. Do we feel we will be tainted? God going to cross us off His list as soon as we enter the doors? Is going to a different denomination's service, even for one week, such a terrible thing? To do so on a regular basis would probably mean you get a good talking to. Suppose I deserve a good talking to then. I haven't been to a Canadian Reformed service in two months…

"let each be convinced in his own mind" v. 5
It's not our job to convince other denominations to adopt our manner or doing things. They're already saved, so join in spreading the gospel.

Fight the good fight that Paul speaks about to Timothy in both his letters to him. Run the race. Compete. Stop looking around at everyone else who is running the race and telling them they're competing wrong. You're not the one giving away the prize! If you keep your eye focused on how other people are running 'wrong' you'll just trip yourself. All Christians are running the same race. We are fighting the same fight. Stop fighting each other. In World War II, the Allies put aside their differences to fight the Nazis. They recognized that they had the same enemy. They didn't refuse to join because one country didn't 'hold their guns the right way.' If each country had focused on trying to get every other country to do things the same way as them, the Nazis would've walked right over and won. If you bicker and argue about mundane details, refusing to join in allegiance, Satan will get stronger. Earth is at war, has been since the Fall. Don't give in. Fight the real enemy, not your allies.

I know this has been long, but I'm going to end this speech with some quotes that stuck out for me.

Paul, in his letter to the Romans: "Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others"

Paul, in his first letter to the Corinthians: "For we were all baptized by one Spirit into one body - whether Jew or Greek, slave or free - and we were all given the one Spirit to drink… there should be no division in the body, but that it's parts should have equal concern for each other… Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it."

Paul, in his letter to the Galatians: "There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus."

Paul, in his letter to the Ephesians: "We are members of His body"

Paul, in his letter to the Philippians: "The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached… Forgetting what is behind and straining to what is ahead I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

Paul, in his letter to the Colossians: "His body, which is the church" ..."Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord."

Paul, in his first and second letter to Timothy: "fight the good fight"

Paul, in his letter to Titus: "But avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless."

Paul(?), in his letter to the Hebrews: "May the God of peace, who through the blood of the eternal covenant brought back from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great Shepherd of the sheep, equip you with everything good for doing his will, and may he work in us what is pleasing to him, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen."